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Week of March 13, 2006

You can take "The Peacemaker," "Deep Impact," and "The Tuxedo." We'll take "Gladiator," "American Beauty" and anything else that didn't suck.

Emilio's 17

Yeah, like he needed all that overpriced crap anyway...

This lawsuit's going to make 'House Party' look like 'House Party Two!'

I told you... don't call me SENIOR!!

Maybe this is all a bad dream too?

Thanks Sharon, but I think I'll wait until this one comes out on DVD (so I can freeze frame of course)

There is absolutely, positively no nepotism in Hollywood. None.

You're good, baby, I'll give you that... but me? I'm magic.

This band will go down like a lead balloon

Well, Goodbye there Children...

They can't sell the Capitol Records building! What will be left to destroy in the next crappy 'end of the world' movie?

Same old Courtney - still sponging off Kurt

Panic on the streets of Austin

You're a fat, Botox faced, wig-wearing ninny! Oh yeah? Well your band has a dirty H addict as a lead singer!

Black Sabbath, Blondie, Miles Davis, The Sex Pistols, Lynyrd Skynyrd Enter Rock Hall



01 THE BREAK-UP $39.17
$12759/av

02 X-MEN: THE LAST STAND $34.02
$9159/av

03 OVER THE HEDGE $20.65
$5170/avg

04 THE DAVINCI CODE $18.61
$4953/avg

05 MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE III $4.68
$1756/avg

06 POSEIDON $3.49
$1283/avg

07 RV $3.20
$1469/avg

08 SEE NO EVIL $2.04
$1607/avg

09 AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH $1.36
$17615/avg

10 JUST MY LUCK $855K
$892/avg










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KENTUCKY FRIED RASSLIN'

By Scott Bowden

May 12, 2005

Wrestling at the Chase: Scott Bowden recalls the drama of Jerry Lawler’s quest for the World title.

The attempts to make instant superstars of Batista and John Cena by having them win WWE’s two most important championships was probably the right decision in the long run. But while the WrestleMania showdowns were booked pretty well in the weeks leading up to the card, I can’t help but think of how much more dramatic their wins would have been with a little more of a chase for the championship. It’s no secret that psychology is sorely lacking in the business today, resulting in some lame storytelling, especially when it comes to promoting the championships, which are viewed more and more by today’s fans as nothing more than props.

For me, the fascination of the chase for the World heavyweight title began around 1978 and ended 10 years later, as my lone hometown sports hero Jerry “the King” Lawler came heartbreakingly close but could never win the big one—until May 9, 1988.

But I’m getting ahead of myself here.

Despite having a rep within the business as relying on bizarre gimmick matches and bloody feuds—“that crappy Tennessee wrestling,” according to Greg Valentine—the Memphis territory’s main storyline for years was Lawler’s quest for the World heavyweight championship. As a kid growing up in Memphis without a pro sports team, Lawler’s chase filled a void in my life, and it was captivating to say the least.

While some promoters like the late Eddie Graham booked frequent World title matches in his Florida territory during the time period, with his star, Dusty Rhodes, usually in the challenger’s role, promoter Jerry Jarrett featured the NWA and AWA kingpins only sparingly, with each appearance a real event in the area. He did so for a few reasons: Jarrett was a bit cheap, and the Memphis territory would draw well regardless if the World champion was appearing, so why bother with the expense. Even more important: the elder Double J knew that it was the chasing of the goal—not the actual accomplishment itself—that held the real drama.

The turning point in Lawler’s career occurred when Jarrett aggressively sought the cooperation of promoters nationwide in helping transform the King of Memphis into a legit World championship contender. Lawler had already wrestled Terry Funk twice for the championship, but Jarrett wanted the fans to really believe the local boy could indeed make good on his promise to win the title.

The savvy promoter created a year-long program—the Quest for the Title—in which Lawler would methodically knock off the top-10 contenders to get a shot at NWA World champ Jack Brisco. In an interview with Tim Dills of the Kayfabe Memories Web site, Jarrett says Eddie Graham flew into town to see firsthand the result of his masterful booking: a packed house at the Mid-South Coliseum and a hot crowd that popped every time Lawler seemed to be close to winning the famed 10 pounds of gold. Lawler did get a taste of the championship that night—for about 30 seconds. With manager Sam Bass cheering him on, Lawler wrapped a chain around his fist and knocked the champ’s lights out, a shot that Brisco sold perfectly. (That was pretty much Lawler’s finishing move in those days.) The crowd briefly thought the title had changed hands before Jack’s brother, Jerry, (Mr. McMahon’s on-air flunky) stooged off the chain to referee Tommy Marlin, who disqualified the challenger.

Despite the consistent success of the territory, Jarrett claims the NWA made it clear that Memphis would most likely never see a title change, even a quickie (similar to Tommy Rich in Georgia and Dusty in Tampa). In addition, the perennial NWA champ in the ’70s and early ’80s, Harley Race, disliked Lawler and Jarrett because the promotion had made it appear that the King had pinned all of his challengers during the Quest for the Title run when in fact most of the wins came via disqualification or countout. Race claims he was so ticked off about the King’s apparent conquering of “the entire NWA” that he challenged Lawler to a shoot prior to a schedule title defense. Luckily for Lawler, cooler heads prevailed.

Fearing that fans would catch on that the World titlist would never drop the strap in Memphis, Jarrett switched allegiance from the National Wrestling Alliance (NWA) to Verne Gagne’s AWA (American Wrestling Association) in the late ’70s. Gagne’s heel champ, Nick Bockwinkel, had some classic matches with Lawler n ’78 and ’79, reinvigorating the chase. During one such match, an old drunken man sitting next to me at the Coliseum was in tears as confessed to me that he “do anything—even give up a month’s pay” to see Lawler win the World belt in his lifetime.

Unable to negotiate a title change with Gagne, Jarrett created his own World title, the Continental Wrestling Association (CWA) championship in 1979. To give the title credibility, Jarrett brought in Superstar Graham, who two years earlier had been all over the Apter mags as WWWF champion, to dethrone journeyman Pat McGinniss in Memphis. Graham, of course, dropped the belt to Lawler a short time later in Lexington.

After Lawler broke his leg, the title bounced around to guys like Bill Dundee to Austin Idol to Billy Robinson before it was finally forgotten. When Lawler returned from a broken leg in December 1980, the chase for a true World title was back on.

When Jarrett reached an agreement to bolster the talent ranks of Jim Crockett Promotions as JCP prepared to go national and fight McMahon’s expanding WWF in 1985, Lawler was promised a brief run with the NWA championship. The promotion again planned a year-long program, with Lawler promising to win the World title in 1985 or retire. As I’ve documented here previously, Crockett reneged upon the deal after he got McMahon’s time slot on Ted Turner’s SuperStation—he didn’t need Jarrett or Lawler anymore.

Three years later in 1988, with the AWA on its last legs, Jarrett reached a deal with Gagne to finally make Lawler the organization’s World champ. On May 9, 1988—decreed Jerry “the King” Lawler Day in the City of Memphis by Mayor Dick Hackett—I sat in the third row as the city’s number-one son pinned the late Curt Hennig to finally win the title. (Tensions were running so high during the bout that a huge fight broke out directly in the seating row ahead of Mayor Hackett, who had to scramble for cover.) When special ref Jackie Fargo counted to four (by accident), the pop was about as amazing as you might expect, as the bloody King of Memphis was finally crowned heavyweight champion of the world.

To celebrate the monumental end of the chase, my friend and I scooped up dozens of complimentary Jerry Lawler posters, which had been distributed to the fans in attendance by a tobacco company. We arrived early at our high school Tuesday morning to tape the posters all over the campus, along with a huge sign in the cafeteria congratulating the King of the World. I’ll never forget the reaction of my appalled English teacher, Mr. Scates: “That horrid man’s face is all over the school!”

It was a nice touch that Monday’s RAW included a clip of the win in promoting their 24/7 channel, with announcer Jim Ross noting that it was 17 years ago to the day that Lawler won the AWA championship. That’s ironic because in ’88, when Lawler regularly badmouthed Randy Savage and Ric Flair as being “company champions,” Ross, then a WCW announcer, referred to Lawler as “the World champion recognized only within the city limits of Memphis, Tennessee.”

In reality (and I use that term loosely when discussing the business), Lawler defended the title against a pretty impressive group of challengers: Hennig, Kerry Von Erich, Austin Idol, Tatsumi Fujinami, Buddy Landell and Wahoo McDaniel. The feud with Von Erich was initiated to create a new chase, this time for the World Class championship, which Lawler won at the AWA’s SuperClash III in Chicago. Even though I’d pretty much stopped buying the Apter mags at that point, which I used to check regularly as a kid to see where Lawler was ranked in the AWA ratings, it was nice to see the King get recognition as a legit World champion. Maybe that’s because Lawler’s chase for the title was my chase as well. I wonder if today’s fans feel that same connection to Batista and John Cena.

Like a Bad Dream: Dusty Rhodes’ booking of an NWA:TNA PPV card featuring all cage matches probably contributed to his ouster this week as booker of the company. Ah, but don’t weep for Rhodes, as it appears he will remain as the Director of Authority character.

And if that doesn’t work out, the Dream detailed his plans to conquer Hollywood on the WRESTLING OBSERVER LIVE radio show. Seems the Dream recently finished up his first screenplay, while also polishing up a sitcom idea called “Dusty’s Place,” in which he plays a Sam Malone-type character who owns a bar. Can’t miss.

Racqueteering: According to Mike Johnson over at PWInsider, the WWE recently mandated that Jim Cornette take more than a month off from overseeing OVW, the company’s developmental territory. Mike writes: “At last Wednesday's Ohio Valley Wrestling taping, Daniel Puder was teaming with Kevin Fertig (Seven aka Mordecai during a brief run on SMACKDOWN!) against Kenzo Suzuki and El Diablo (Ken Doane) in a dark match. Fertig came to the ring wearing a baseball cap backwards, and was said to have basically goofed around in the ring, putting the hat back on after taking bumps and other antics designed to pop the other wrestlers. Jim Cornette, who is extremely old school and very much a throwback loyalist to the art of professional wrestling, sent word to the ring that Fertig was to knock it off. In return, Fertig took a sombrero that a fan at ringside was wearing and starting doing more spots, which some took as blatant disregard of Cornette's instructions. When Fertig returned to the back, he was subject to one of Cornette's trademark colorful promos, where he was chewed out for making a mockery when he was supposed to be out there to help the others learn and to improve himself. It had been the latest outburst from Cornette, which turned out to be the incident that caused WWE to send him home.” Too bad Cornette didn’t hit this goof with his famed loaded tennis racquet.

I hope WWE brings back Cornette soon, as I don’t think there’s a better person to influence the young talent. He’s got a tremendous mind for the business, mastering in wrestling psychology, something sorely needed in today’s product. Hmmm…sounds like I’m repeating myself.

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Addicted to Bad
by Patrick Keller

International Intrigue
by Alison Veneto

Nocturnal Admissions
by D.K. Holm

Strange Impersonation
by Kim Morgan

Trailer Park
by Christopher Stipp




New DVD Releases
for April 11, 2006

DVD Diatribe
by D.K. Holm

DVD Late Show
by Christopher Mills




Preachin' from the Longbox
by Britt Schramm

Should It Be a Movie?
by Marc Mason

New Comic Book Releases
for April 12, 2006, 2006




New CD Releases
for April 11, 2006

Music for the Masses
by M.C. Bell




TV Recommendations
Boob toob picks of the week by Chris Ryall

Kentucky Fried Rasslin'
by Scott Bowden

TV Pilot Review Archives
by Chris Ryall



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