by Scott Tipton
July 27, 2005
WISH YOU WERE HERE: THE PROFESSOR IN HIS NATURAL HABITAT
We embark on a noble experiment – a day-by-day travelogue of the biggest comics/movies/pop culture event ever: the 2005 Comic-Con International: San Diego. Every year I get scores of readers asking for a report on the show, and every year I never get around to it. Not this year. I’ll be attempting to give you unfortunate landlocked fans a little taste of what goes on here in sunny San Diego at the true Geek Mecca. Let’s get right to it.
Day -1 – Tuesday, July 12, 2005
We (“we” being the girlfriend and myself, for future reference) pull in to San Diego in the early afternoon, and as usual are astounded by the amount of construction and road obstacles in the downtown San Diego area. It seems like every year it gets tougher and tougher to drive around the already circuitous Gaslamp District, the three- or four-block stretch of shops, bars and restaurants that becomes the general off-convention hangout for some 87,000 con-goers. Luckily, we won’t be driving very much. Thanks to a combination of luck and preparation, we’ll be staying at San Diego’s newest hotel, which is not only right across the street from the convention center, but is also attached to Petco Park, the new baseball stadium that will be hosting four home San Diego Padres games the four days of the show, a fact that has many Comic-Con veterans positively quaking in their boots over the potential crowd nightmares and traffic snafus. Me, I’m not that worried about it (and between you and me, I worry about everything) and am even planning on taking in a game sometime this week. Still, I have no intention of taking the car anywhere until the show’s over on Monday.
After checking into the hotel, we head over to the Convention Center to commence booth construction for Toynami, the toy company I’ve been working with for the last few years. It’s an ambitious setup this year, and we have to be done by 6:00 tomorrow night to be ready for the attendees for Wednesday’s Preview Night. Still, we’ve managed to accomplish more in less time in years past, so again, I’m not so worried. In fact, construction proceeds at such a smooth pace that I find I’m not needed much today, and so I take a little time to wander around the show floor as the Comic-Con is essentially built from the ground up.
It’s an amazingly hectic place, with forklifts and skyjacks frantically speeding the floor, while union shop stewards on bicycles survey the place like hawks to make sure any and all construction is being performed by their union crew alone. It’s not at all conducive to sightseeing, as one needs to keep constantly vigilant when walking the aisles, to make sure you’re not run over, run into, or just plain whacked silly. Case in point: last year, our booth designer was also overseeing the construction of another booth a few aisles away, and when he wasn’t looking while running between the two booths, somebody working at the other booth turned away from him with a steel rod over her shoulder, and cracked him smack across the face in classic Moe Howard fashion. Ouch, man. I felt that one from 30 feet away. (This, by the way, is why you don’t see any photos of this period, as exhibitors and union workers are already hurried, frazzled and inattentive due to the pressures of the build, and the last thing they need is a flashbulb to distract them. That’s how people wind up knocked flat.)
Still, in my brief time on the floor, I did notice a thing or two. The overall impression of the place is not unlike Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory: the completely outlandish couched in the mundanity of production. Examples? Seeing Ghost Rider’s motorcycle wheeled in by a couple of union guys, for instance. A 12-foot-tall inflatable Pikachu lolling on its side, next to a bright-yellow Pikachumobile. A life-sized Dobby from Harry Potter peeking out of a plywood crate. It’s pretty cool. (A funny story: A couple of years ago, the 1966 Adam West Batmobile was on display in the hall. When the show was over and everyone was busily packing up, as they drove the Batmobile out of the hall, you could see everyone stop whatever work they were doing to reverently watch the Batmobile pass by. Professionals, laborers, electricians or exhibitors, we’re all geeks at heart.)
Soon enough, it’s 6:30, and everyone is booted from the exhibit hall for the evening, with the promise of an early start the next morning: 7 a.m. Yeah, I don’t see that happening, either…
On the way back to the hotel, we notice that the Old Spaghetti Factory, an extremely popular restaurant for countless attendees over the years, has closed up shop. Definitely bad news. Personally, I couldn’t stand the place, but it was always packed to the gills, and its absence means that every other restaurant in the Gaslamp will now be that much more crowded. Motivated by this revelation, we decide to hit our favorite restaurant tonight, before any of the real Comic-Con crowds arrive. Hello, Rockin’ Baja Lobster…
Day 0.5 – Wednesday, July 13, 2005
After another long day of prep (which once again I turned out not to be needed for all that much), we find ourselves at the Con a couple of hours before Preview Night, the three-hour sneak preview of the Exhibit Hall that the show offers to folks who buy a full four-day membership. And the fans are lined up by the hundreds to get in as early as 2 in the afternoon. That’s not all: the media is out in full force, too, with news choppers overhead and news vans parked out front to get some good shots of the mayhem. While I’d have loved Preview Night when I was strictly a fan, it’s a real problem from an exhibitors’ standpoint, as many of us need every minute to get ready for the Thursday morning debut. This year, however, we’re way ahead of schedule, and are ready to go when the doors open at 6 p.m.
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While we wait for the first attendees to show up, I chat with Poop Shoot Kahuna Ryall, who’s there overseeing the IDW booth, and our own Toy Box correspondent Michael Crawford, who’s taking advantage of his press pass to get some good shots before the teeming masses arrive. What’s he looking at? Same as me: the new JUSTICE LEAGUE UNLIMITED action figures from Mattel, with all kinds of new characters appearing as toys for the first time, including Black Canary, Vixen, Supergirl, Steel, Kilowog, Dr. Light and plenty more.
Soon enough the fans are inside, and are frantically running around trying to get as many of the action-figure exclusives as possible. It’s quite a spectacle. I head out and do a little sightseeing myself, and discover a wondrous sight: a Rocketeer helmet that the good folks at Master Replica will be offering for sale later this year.
Ask, and ye shall receive.
By 8:00, I’ve had my first con hot dog of the weekend, and it was only nine bucks. Well, no, it wasn’t that expensive, but lord, it wasn’t cheap. Before you know it, the three hours of Preview Night are up, and security is ushering everyone without an exhibitor’s badge to the exits. All in all, a very successful Preview Night. A healthy crowd lined up to buy our exclusives all night, and our new offerings are very well-received. While the mob crowds into the Gaslamp to try to get a bite to eat, we’ve thought ahead and made a reservation (table for 13, please?) at our favorite Italian place for the customary company Preview Night dinner.
Day 1 – Thursday, July 14, 2005
We head over to the Con bright and early at 8:30 to make some last-minute adjustments to the booth, and see another massive crowd lineup out front to get in.
We hear scuttlebutt from passersby that there’s already no parking available for blocks, and give ourselves another pat on the back for staying so close and making sure we don’t have to touch the car all week.
As soon as the doors open for Thursday, the crowds start lining up across from us at the Mattel booth, where they’re raffling off the opportunity to buy their Batman convention exclusives.
We resolve to try to cover the entire floor today, since there’s not much we definitely need to see upstairs at the panels. Some four hours later, we’re exhausted, but it’s done. We’ve covered the place from wall to wall, and now know where everything is for more focused, targeted shopping runs later in the week. After a brief stop at IDW for some schmoozing with Ryall, we head upstairs to see the Man, the Myth, the Legend himself: Bruce Campbell.
The panel before Bruce is still going on when we arrive, a discussion of the only-recently-optioned SPIRIT movie that Jeph Loeb is scripting. The really good (and surprising) news is that not only is Loeb writing a SPIRIT/BATMAN crossover for the comics, but NEW FRONTIER writer/artist Darwyn Cooke will be writing and drawing a monthly SPIRIT book as well. Good times.
Before long, Bruce hits the stage, and he’s a riot. His first words when he takes the mike? “This place is a goddamn zoo!” It’s the Comic-Con panel I’ve been waiting years to see, as Bruce verbally eviscerates anyone who asks a stupid question (and as anyone who’s ever been to Comic-Con can attest, there’s no shortage of stupid questions). Some of my favorite responses: to a guy who asked how exactly to “make love the Bruce Campbell way” (a reference to the title of Campbell’s new book): “You are a moron, sir. Sit down and don’t speak for the rest of the panel. You’re done.”
When someone asks when the book will come out in paperback, Bruce lets loose. “What, because you’re too cheap to buy the hardcover? Don’t have any money? What’d you pay to get in here, pal?”
Bruce ends with a hilarious rant about the creative bankruptcy of Hollywood, and then he’s out.
Back down on the floor, I stop by the Sideshow Collectibles booth to pick up their Ultimate Hellboy exclusive (Sideshow actually makes you order the exclusives in advance and you just pick them up at the show, a genius idea that gets rid of another long line to wait in), and wander around a while longer, soaking up the Comic-Con experience.
The costumed fans are out in force already, and I repeatedly see director John Landis strolling around, apparently delighted to be there.
Seven p.m. comes before you know it, and the masses head back out for the Gaslamp, with a heavy police presence marshaling the crowds across the street. I overhear one cop telling another, who’d apparently never worked the show, “Dude, it’s not even bad yet. Wait until Saturday.” We consider taking in a Padres game since the ballpark is so close, but one look at the lineup at the ticket office dissuades us from that idea. Instead, we opt for room service and a trip to the hot tub. Life in the fast lane, baby.
Day 2 – Friday, July 15, 2005
AAGGGGGGGGHHHHH! I’m awakened in the middle of the night by an unexpected and excruciating toothache. We’re talking Defcon 1 here, folks. It’s brutal. I stumble to the bathroom and find some Advil, and manage to get back to sleep somehow, only to awaken to – mostly nothing. A little discomfort, but nothing like what I was going through before. Looks like I’m out of the woods -- or so I thought…
At the show, we split our time between Artist’s Alley, working the booth and more exploring of the hall, until the VERONICA MARS panel in the afternoon. I came to the show late in the season, but was totally won over, and it’s cool to hear from the full cast (minus Veronica herself, unfortunately, with the actress shooting a movie in Europe). By mid-afternoon, I start to see a couple of curious trends on the floor. By midday, there are hundreds of people walking the floor wearing Guy Fawkes masks from V FOR VENDETTA. It’s absolutely creepy, I tell you. I soon learn that they were a giveaway from the morning’s Warner Brothers panel, which featured healthy coverage of the movie. (And by the way, if anyone out there has one of those masks they’re willing to give up, I’m sure I can arrange a trade that will be worth your while. E-mail me.) Also spreading across the floor like wildfire are the Force FX lightsabers from Master Replica – exact copies of Darth Vader, Anakin Skywalker or Mace Windu’s sabers that not only light up but also make perfect “lightsaber” sound effects as you wave them or strike an object, thanks to motion sensors in the hilt.
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At $120, they’re actually selling like hotcakes, so much so that when I attend the Star Wars panel later that afternoon, an announcement is actually made before the show starts: “Those of you with lightsabers, please turn them off before we begin.” And with that, 50 or 60 lightsabers go down all at once. ZZZZHNMMMZZZ! ZZZZHNMMMZZZ! ZZZZHNMMMZZZ! Hilarious.
What’s not so hilarious is my tooth. As the day has gone on, my toothache has returned with a vengeance, so much so that I consider not going to the Eisner Awards that night. Still, I suck it up and we head over to Ballroom 20, where we meet up with Ryall and the posse from IDW. My toothache must have been affecting my concentration that night, clearly, as for the first time ever Ryall claims a victory in our annual Eisner Prediction Rumble, after many years of humiliating defeat. Moreover, the evening is something of a bummer, as it’s the first awards ceremony since Will Eisner passed away, and so every presenter and award-winner feels compelled to tell their own Will Eisner story when they’re at the podium.
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A noble and understandable impulse, don’t get me wrong – but over the course of the three-hour event, it starts to feel more like a memorial service and less like a celebration of comics. To be fair, I don’t know how else they could have handled it, but it was a lot to take. Although the evening wasn’t a total loss, as I had a pleasant conversation with John Landis while in line for the bar…
Day 3 – Saturday, July 16, 2005
A near sleepless night, thanks to the toothache, and by 4 a.m. or so, I consider not even heading to the con until late afternoon. I finally doze off, only to awake from a dead sleep with the realization that I was supposed to meet a friend at the con that morning to give him a pass for the show – at 9 a.m. The time I wake up? 9:40! Crap! I leap out of bed, cursing at myself like a sailor with Tourette’s, and grab the cel phone, apologizing to my friend and promising to be there in 15 minutes.
With the adrenaline rush from all this, my toothache recedes once more, and I’m able to proceed with my day. (Why didn’t I get the tooth checked out, you may ask? As it was already the weekend by the time I realized it was serious, I figured I was pretty much out of luck until Monday anyway, and besides, I had obligations, as we’re about to discuss.) Ryall and I had promised our editors on the SUPERHEROES AND PHILOSOPHY book, Tom and Matt Morris, to appear at the Comics Academic Conference panel on the Philosophy of Superheroes. However, what I didn’t expect was that there would actually be folks in attendance. To my surprise, there was a pretty full crowd, and unaccustomed as I am to public speaking, the toothache was suddenly the least of my problems. As it turns out, I had nothing to worry about. Tom, who moderated the panel, immediately got the crowd excited (turns out they don’t make you a professor at Notre Dame unless you’re pretty good at leading a discussion), and the audience was full of smart people asking good questions, so the panel wound up being a highlight of the show (especially with a last-minute appearance by Mark Waid, another contributor to the book).
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Just after the panel, we headed down to the floor for a booksigning at the Comic Relief booth, where we met many of the folks from the audience and wound up completely selling out of books. Not too shabby.
Next up for us was the SERENITY panel, which, while it didn’t give away much about the upcoming movie, was still enjoyable just for the appearance of Joss Whedon and the full cast (minus one, that is, with Alan Tudyk currently performing SPAMALOT on Broadway). What was noticeable was the fan support for the project. While the Star Wars panel from the day before had been about half-full, there wasn’t an empty seat in the 6,500-seat house for SERENITY. Let’s hope that translates to the box office…
Also stopped into the IDW panel, where Ryall was holding court along with creative types like the great Peter David, fielding questions on what’s up for the publisher in the next 12 months. As for the exhibit hall, the crowds were positively heinous, probably the most crowded I’ve ever seen it. Helpful hint: if you’re going to the Con to shop, Saturday is not the day to go. You’re better off going to the show Friday and Sunday, and, I don’t know, hitting Sea World on Saturday. It’ll be less crowded, and you’ll have more fun. Plus, there are penguins.
Last for us on Saturday was the KING KONG panel and the Tenacious D performance, which was absolutely unreal. By far the longest line I saw all weekend was for the D, with attendees lining up outside the Convention Center and snaking up and down outside. After a hilariously vulgar intro by our own Bossman Kevin Smith, Jack Black and Kyle Gass took the stage for what has to have been one of the best-received performances ever in front of a Comic-Con audience. JB and KG were in rare form here, and the audience ate it up. Probably the best time I’ve ever had at Comic-Con. Having never seen the D live before, it was a real treat. And when it come to surreal experiences, hearing 6,500 people sing along to such Tenacious D favorites as “Fuck Her Gently” has to be right up there. The D rocks.
Day 4 – Sunday, July 17, 2005
Another rough night with the toothache, but I make it to the floor before the show opens for some last-day shopping. Sunday is usually my traditional day for buying, and this year would be no exception, tooth or no tooth. Not only do I score a number of things I’ve been trying to find for years and a whole bunch of Japanese import stuff you can’t buy anywhere else (although still no Mego Green Arrow car, dammit), I also break down and buy one of those Force FX lightsabers myself, opting for the classic EMPIRE STRIKES BACK Darth Vader model. The remainder of my day is split between checking out the panel about the DOOM movie (Meh. Although the Rock was entertaining as always.), manning the booth and continuing to look for last-minute bargains. As it always does, that last day flies by like quicksilver, and soon the voice over the public address system makes that fateful announcement – “Comic-Con 2005 is over!” – followed by the traditional response from us exhibitor types: a bloodcurdling whoop somewhere between the Rebel Yell and that noise Xena makes right before she chops someone’s head off with that razor Frisbee thing of hers.
That may be the end of the day for the attendees, but not for us, as the booth it took us two days to construct now has to be torn down and packed away in a matter of hours. If the construction period seems hectic and potentially dangerous, teardown is much worse, as everyone’s exhausted and in a hurry to go home. And once again, here I wind up having to leave early after a couple of hours, as I take a bite of a cookie (a very small bite, mind you) and nearly pass out from the pain in my tooth. A quick trip back to the hotel and a bowl of soup from room service, and I’m at least a little more comfortable, if still pretty miserable.
So that was Comic-Con for this year. Other than the blinding pain, it was actually pretty cool.
As for me, after a massive dose of antibiotics for an infected tooth and emergency root-canal surgery, I’m fine, thanks for asking. Got questions about the Comic-Con experience? Send ‘em to stipton99x@moviepoopshoot.com.
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